The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
