Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
