He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
