I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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