Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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