doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
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