Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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