so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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