oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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