He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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