they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
