omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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