Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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