I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
