Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
