He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize