im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
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i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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