party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
zippers are such a cool invention
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
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i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
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Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.