dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
