Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize