I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize