Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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