I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
we're so committed to being not committed
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
