dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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