i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Come on in and take your pants off
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