also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize