Dual....:-)
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
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