so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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