its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
