My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
he was CRYING into my vagina
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Randomize
