that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
