i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
