Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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