Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me