What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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