Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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