Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
