Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
