Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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