She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
