Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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