Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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