FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
