I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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