and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
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he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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