Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
