They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
