69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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