He is such a slut. More and more my type.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize
