Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
