I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize
