tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
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I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
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She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
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